Friday, March 8, 2013

The Best Thing About Global Warming

It's going to get the Komodo dragons before it gets us.  Scientists say global warming is killing off lizards all over the world.

Komodo dragons are especially vile lizards. When they tear into their prey, the snake-like venom in their bite sends their victims into shock and stops their blood from clotting. If global warming is doing them in, we may be seeing our first and only proof of intelligent design, or at least convincing proof of the cleverness of mankind.

Here's a Komodo eating a pig. 

According to Jack Sites, a biology professor at Brigham Young University, rising temperatures are keeping lizards from eating enough to take care of their eggs. "The heat doesn't kill them. They just don't reproduce," Sites says. "It doesn't take too much of that and the population starts to crash."

We knocked off the dinosaurs by eating their goddam eggs. Now we're making it too hot for the Komodos to reproduce. Get out there and mow those lawns, people!

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